I’m too young to care about what tomorrow brings, noone ever cared about what I might say.. You like me, you hate me, it’s all the same, whats the difference really. Worrying about what you think, will drive me insane, drive me right off the edge. Be who you are, love what you do. Smile in the mirror, the reflection’s is true love.
Sometimes when I look up I see stars that cut through the sky and fade quickly into nothingness and I pray that you’re not feeling that way because all I want is for you to see the stars. When im lying in bed I get the same feeling that gravity will just turn off and I’ll fall endlessly into something much larger than I am and I wonder if that’s what it feels like to die and if I’ll ever understand the meaning of life. I hope when you lay in bed every thought is a good thought and you lay there and you think about your day you think of all the things that make you happy and you are already into something much larger then life itself but you dont fall you climb.
I feel like noone is around me. I feel like im in this fake world around fake people who have fake feelings. Trying to get through the day with noone there for you is an awful feeling. Im not anyones number 1, the go to person. I wanna feel again, I wanna feel wanted. I want to be put in vulnerable situations where im playing russian roullete with my heart. I want to be someones reason to wake up in the morning, someones reason to smile. I wanna touch someones heart and I wanna run with it but most of all I want someone to run away with my heart. I need people to need me.. to want me. I want to to give my all to someone, day in and day out. I want to love someones imperfections, I want my whole heart to beat for 1 person. I want to give my all to someone. I want to hurt for them and hurt with them. I want to know someone loves me, I wanna love again.
I remember that heartbreak. The kind of heartbreak that make you wonder who you are and where you are going. The kind of heartbreak that all you feel is guilt and self blaming. The kind of heartbreak of losing someone I thought I loved. The kind of heartbreak like a that stabs your heart… The kind of heartbreak like you have fallen down a cliff and there is no way up or you are dragged by a stone so heavy and you sink and sink. The kind of heartbreak that you wanna escape everything, and find an isolated place where you can live the rest of the life. The kind of heartbreak that makes your heart feel heavy. The kind of heartbreak you think you will never get over but when you do its one of the best feelings ever. I have never felt so free, its almost like this whole time it was just a twisted thought I had in my head, like it never existed.
Do you care? Does it matter to you? I can’t make you care, but I can try my hardest to make you see that it matters. We have to fight the urge to see people as robots that we can say whatever we want about. People are real, seeing through eyes just like ours, feeling the same pains, the same feelings, and trying to find some kind of meaning in life. Don’t take that for granted. Don’t ignore it because its difficult to accept. We are people, we have the life for all things, and without a respect for all people we will never see happiness. We will live selfish lives full of our selfish desires that will never give us any knowledge. I promise you that.. and thats why you have to enjoy the little things in life and enjoy people who make you smile. Keep the people in your life that make you laugh close and forget about the people who dont.
happy new year. New year, new beginnings, changes, lives, partners and mindsets. Is the new year really suppose to be that? In my head the new year means your blessed with another year on this growing world, so live it. Make the best of it, so many people are so caught up with the changes they forget to just live. My new years resolution or even better new years goal is to Live my life to the fullest. Something happens, move past it. A good thing happens, embrace it. Smile, laugh and love when your not suppose to. Make mistakes and learn from them. Don’t let someone or something hold you back from living your life. Thats not saying be crazy and not care for anyone else. Its not saying you won’t get your heart broken and give way to many chances. It means don’t hold back. Make someone smile, make someone laugh, be in comfortable silence with someone. Don’t be with anyone that doesn’t make your life better. I made that mistake, and it was hard finally accepting that but I did and I can say I’m truly happy. This new year means take chances and never look back. Don’t sacrifice the gift of life and not live in it to the fullest.
something happens, quickly you look around, your hands go weak and your voice starts to shake. You look at other people or maybe no one at all. You feel rushed, boggled, thirsty and confused. You can’t speak or even walk, your shocked, stunned even. Do you know what to do or what to say? You feel obligated to walk or to run far far away but then your mind kicks in and says stay. Dont leave, you can’t you will regret it… but then you leave anyway.. your whole life after that is like living in what seems a dream. Do you tell someone or do you live your whole life in fear and regret. You are never the same, somedays you think your crazy but then you look around you and see so many normal people its like how can I be? Its 12 at night your laying in bed, hearing the voices inside your head saying why, where, who, how.. A tear rolls down your face in frustration of lacking sleep, you roll over on your side, switch the pillow to find a cold side because the heat from the pillow is making your anxious. You lay for a while, close your eyes, see bad things but finally your eyes shut and your realities become just a dream, then you wake up and it starts all over again.
When someone fights for you.. when a person takes the initiative to voice that they want you. All we wanna be is a lover to someone and when something goes wrong all anyone wants is a little fight. A little extra effort to say no… stay. Their is words in this world that can mean so many things. For example, love. It can be awful or it can be the greatest thing to ever happen to you. Hate usually is negative but sure it can be positive.. you need to learn to hate if you ever want to learn to love. What im getting at is the simple 4 letter words like love,hate but stay can change everything. “Stay” dont leave just stay. It can save a relationship or destroy a relationships. 60 seconds, 1 minute can change your whole life forever. One word, one phone call, one person can change your life forever. You never know whats going to happen so thats why im writing this to say when you feel something for anything dont let it go.. say those 4 letter words when needed. People do not realize how lucky we are to even have a chance to say you love someone or to tell someone to stay. Dont look back even though its scary. Say something before someone gives up on you.
everybody on christmas wants to feel something. As we get older the presents can not be bought. We open and open materials and things but in the back of our mind all you want is someone to love you. Is there anything like knowing that someone loves you? I know, I know family always loves you but its like they are supposed to.. they are meant too. Their is nothing like knowing that another person loves and cares for you more then themselves. They would do anything for you, take a bullet, get in trouble, cry, smile, change. There is nothing like it, in the world. Money can not buy it because if it could people would be much happier. My title for today is love on christmas, I say love on christmas because christmas is a day where love is needed but mostly wanted. To talk to your loved one on the phone or cuddle up after a long day of family and food. There is nothing like it. As I write this my 1 wish would be to have that but hey I dont but I know someday I will.
There are so many different feelings of life. So many emotions that the body can produce. Its simply amazing if you think about it. You can be so happy, grinning ear to ear about something that just happened. It can be something so small and it can make you happier then anything has in days. Then again of course their is a bad side to every good feeling. When you are happy something can make you so sad in minutes. Either something has happened or something has been said. Its like a relationship.. everything is so good but then one word, one fight can change everything. Its crazy how much life can change in the matter of seconds. Never have any regrets, they were choices you made for a reason. Life is a rollercoaster of emotions, you
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